Silicon Valley Moms Blog

All I want for Christmas is to be debt free

For the past several years my husband and I have made the choice to take a huge salary cut in order to allow me to stay at home to raise our kids five days out of seven.  To say that we pinch pennies would be an understatement.  Living is expensive.  Doing it in Silicon Valley on 1.4 salaries is down right crazy.

With me in school, again, one child in preschool, and swim lessons for both the kids, we live and breath the balancing act of spending money.

As Christmas creeps up, a knot the size of a mango implants itself deep within my gut.  We have many, many family members.  And gifts are a must.  Christmastime presents a huge financial challenge for us, as it does many American families.  You see, I refuse to go into debt over one holiday.  I will not spend money that we don't have

 

The placebo effect

So, we've resorted to buying a nasty tasting nail polish for our daughter.  She just won't stop sucking her thumb.  Don't judge me. :-) I tried, I mean really tried to do this using only intrinsic, and sometimes extrinsic motivation.  We've tried band aids on the thumbs... We've tried dolls, with strings attached.  We've tried talking to her about being a 'big girl'.

Nothing has worked.  When we put a band aid on one thumb, my daughter just says, "That's OK mommy, I'll suck my other thumb."  When we cover both thumbs, she just sucks a finger.

The morning after, my daughter will tell us, with a smile on her face, "It's OK Mommy, I just sucked another finger."

Grr.

That child.  She is a stubborn one.  I KNOW she can fall asleep without the thumb.  She's done it many times.  But won't on her own accord.

iPhone, my personal nanny

About month ago my husband upgraded his iPhone to the new 3G.  I got the hand-me-down. My own personal first generation iPhone!!  Let's just say that excitement is hardly containable.  I'm pretty much sure I'm in love.

I knew that my new little buddy could be used to compose emails, check the time, read news articles, you know... just about everything.  I even knew that as soon as I got my clumsy thumbs on it's keypad I'd join the twenty first century and learn how to (gasp) text.  Ya, I know!!

What I didn't realize was how my iPhone could come in handy as my own personal nanny. 

iNanny has come in handy a ton recently.  Two weeks I headed off to the doctor's office to discuss some holy hell tantrums slightly agitated behavior exhibited by my son.  When it came time to discuss this sensitive issue, I handed him a book and turned her on. Almost instantly iNanny was ready to read him his favorite story, Curious George.

September 11th

I will never forget that day.

Hubby, who was previously Boyfriend, called my apartment early in the morning.

Hubby: SM, wake up.

SM: What's going on?

Hubby: We've been attacked.  I have to go into work early today.  Our city is on high alert.

SM: What do you mean??!!

Hubby: Go turn on your TV.

And on it went.

I woke up my roommate and we sat in front of our television, jaw firmly planted on the ground. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. After sitting, paralyzed, for far too long, both my roommate and I headed to work. Our students would be waiting.

So off we headed, me in my Ford Ranger, listening to Peter Jenning's play by play account. When the second plane flew into the tower, he paused, visibly upset.

I cried.

Tips to Start a New School Year

School is just about back in session and many of our kids are ending yet another summer of fun and relaxation. 

In my ten years of teaching, I've encountered many children who could have benefited from some basic household routines.  As a result I've compiled a list of healthy habits & routines that help make the transition from summer to school much smoother. 

1.  Bedtime, bedtime, bedtime. 
Your child's body, age 12 and under, on average requires 10-11 hours of sleep per night.  Every night.  If you have a teenager, they generally require 8 1/2 hours to 9 1/2 hours of nightly sleep.

Why is this information important?  It's simple.   Kids perform better, are able to focus more, and have better days when they are fully rested.

...sleep deprivation adds up over time, so an hour less per night is like a full night without sleep by the end of the week. Among other things, sleep deprivation can lead to:

• decreased attentiveness
• decreased short-term memory
• inconsistent performance
• delayed response time

2.  Eat a healthy breakfast each morning.

The, the new Duh.

In our house we outlaw words as often as we changed our underwear... almost every day.

The basics have been banned. You know, "What the hell" and "Damn it". Even "Shit," and "Oh my God!" are out.

But DAMage...not out. As passionately as BC tells me that it IS a bad word, I just don't buy it. Yup, DAMage gets to stay.

Ya, we're awful parents like that!

You know, the fact that our kids even know those phrases is a whole other topic that I probably shouldn't get into today.

Ahem. But I digress.

"Shut up" and "Stupid" are crowd favorites here in the Bay Area.

But in our house? Yup. BANNED.

Poopyhead, MeanyPoopyHead, HeadyHeadyPoopyHead.

Yup, TOSSED like last night's cookies.

On Becoming Great

I'm a great mom.  Fantastic.  It is my calling in life.  I'm a good teacher, above average even.  And I'm a good wife.  Sure, I micromanage at times.  And I frequently gripe about the fact that my husband is incapable of turning off a light as he exits a room.  But I'm a good wife, above average even.

But I'm a damn good mom. Or so I'd like to think. Nights like tonight, however, truly humble me.  Nights like tonight I doubt my ability to parent effectively.

We, the kids and I, truck along pretty well all day long.  But after dinner as bedtime approaches, my stomach becomes knotted. 

What will it be today? Will this evening turn sour?

Our family has the same routine every night.  I'm big into routines.  This is good because my son is quite intelligent and craves routine.  He needs structure and must know what is coming up.  So I make verbal lists with him.

Sandblasting and Extractions

For the last several months I’ve had the opportunity to go to an esthetician to get my eyebrows shaped.  As crazy as it sounds, I love this time.  I live for this half hour when I lay down on a heated table, close my eyes and have someone else fret over me. 

I call it my mini-massage.

My esthetician is a perfectionist.  She frets over a single hair.  A common conversation she has with herself over my head goes something like this, “Hmm.  Well I’m almost happy with your eyebrows… but I want to take one more hair off of this eyebrow.  But if I do that I’m afraid it will make the other eyebrow unbalanced.”

I sit there and smile.  Truth be told, I’d be perfectly happy walking out of her office each month with not a single hair left above my eyes.  Just being able to lie on her table while she manipulates my eyebrows is treat enough. 

A few months ago Sandra began telling me about a procedure called microdermabrasion.  I know all about microderm and have been itching to try it out, someday. However, when finances are tough, as they always are, it’s difficult to justify my $20 eyebrow shaping once a month, let alone this much more expensive and oh so unnecessary procedure.

A Teacher Fretting About School

I am a public school teacher and I work in one of strongest academic districts in the Bay Area.  The school I teach at routinely ranks in the top five in California.  It's that good!

My school is also a 'choice' school, meaning that it is students come from all over the school district.  You have to choose to send your kids there.  Therefore school admission is based on a lottery.  When a child's number is called a parent almost always pulls their child out of their current private or public school to enter ours.

I know what great teaching is all about.  I've seen both sides, the good school environment and the bad. 

This is the best.

So why am I fretting about school? 

Simple.  I don't live in the school district in which I teach. 

Teachers can't afford to buy a house there.

A Boy and his Toy

Gunplay is such a hot topic.   Should we let our kids play with guns?  Should we ban them altogether?  Are moms who let their kids play with toy guns ‘bad’ moms?  Will I raise an overly aggressive child if I allow him/her to play with guns?  Will my children and I be shunned by the other moms and dads if we own a toy gun?

These thoughts have all gone through my head. 

Am I making the right decision?  Will my decision harm or alter the course of my children’s lives?

Well today I’m outing myself.  My children each have a toy gun.  Don’t shoot! 

And my husband and I gave those guns to our kids at Christmas.

Phew, I said it.  I can just feel the looks of shock and horror coming across the computer screen!  And frankly, I understand.  With all of the school shootings and other highly publicized atrocities occurring within our country, it’s no wonder many moms I know shudder at the though allowing their child to know about, look at, or touch a toy gun.